Lisa Frank is Rolling in Her Grave...Unless She's Not Dead...?

These are reprinted electronically without permission from the excellent Mountain Man Dance Moves: the McSweeney's Book of Lists, by the Editors of McSweeney's. These are some of my recent favourites. Ah, the unicorns.

Unsuitable Code Names for U.S. Military Operations
by Jim Stallard

Swan Song
Ringworm
Reckless Impulse
Desert Sieve
Shareholder Meeting
Awkward Silence
Iraqi Freedom


Highlights of the First 100 Days of a Unicorn Presidency
by Margaret O'Leary

Universal health care
Simplification of tax code
Cancellation of stealth bomber program
Overhaul of campaign finance regulations
New laws to protect ancient forests
White House redecorated to look like eight-year-old girl's bedroom

Places You're Likely to Find a Unicorn
by Patrick Cassels

The time before time
The Third Age
Where Pan doth play his pipes
Realms of wizardry, necromancy, and general enchantment
New Zealand
Trapper Keepers

***That last one is a total nod to Napoleon Dynamite, ¿no?